John: We’re heading to the office now. Going to print off Katherine’s project and glue it to the project board.
Me: Okay. I’m going to tidy up and do some cooking.
John: Sounds good. Oh! I turned the dishwasher on and it made a weird noise, so I turned it back off again.
Me: Right. Good to know.
(Fast forward five hours. Front door opens.)
John: We’re home! Got everything done except for the… WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO THE DISHWASHER?
Me: Uh, it’s broken.
John: You going to elaborate on that at all?
Me: It’s broken-broken. As in “does not work” broken.
John: Why is it in the middle of the kitchen floor?
Me: I put it there while testing to see where the problem is. I flipped the breaker….
John (interrupts): Oh good.
Me: I FLIPPED THE BREAKER, unscrewed it from the counter and lifted it up onto those blocks. See? Deadlifts are a practical skill!
John: Uh. Okay.
Me: Then I drained it, checked the hoses and intakes for blockages and reconnected it. Turned it on to test it. The motor for the pump is burned out. I could replace it, but the parts place is closed today and the dishwasher is almost eleven years old and has other issues. It’s probably a better idea just to pick up a new one tomorrow. I’ll connect it up. When I decided it was broken, I couldn’t see the point in putting it back.
John: You could replace it…. ?
Me: Yes. I’ve done this twice in the past. I fix pumps in washing machines, too.
John: You fix…. ? How do I not know any of this?
Me: You spent a lot of time at the office? And I’m rather unlike most of the wives of your colleagues.
John: Clearly. Christ, there are tools everywhere here.
Me: Yup. Screwdrivers and the drill for taking the screws out of the underside of the counter.
John: And a hammer. The really good Estwing hammer.
Me: Yes. I didn’t actually have a specific purpose in mind for the hammer, but you just never know when you might need one and when you need a hammer, you really need a hammer.
John: No, dear, that’s BUCKET. When you need a BUCKET, you really need a bucket. Are you done with these?
Me: Until tomorrow. When I pick up the new dishwasher.